Who do you confide in? And should you be?

When my husband was having online affairs I told no one.    I have a lot of reasons for that but the main reason is because I didn't have all the evidence that I needed.    Say the local burglar is talking with someone that I know.  He tells this person that he's been watching my house and sure would like to know what I have inside.  This person tells someone else in confidence and you know how it goes.  When it gets back to me I am going to add extra security to my house and be very aware of everything going on in and around my house to keep him out.  This works exactly the same when you start telling people that you think your spouse is cheating.  Your confidants have trusted friends, partners and children too.   Protect this information and don't make it even harder on yourself to find the proof that you need.